All parents want to raise a child happy and successful. But how to do that? How to raise a child who can realize himself in adulthood?
Well-being, determination, self-confidence are the main signs of a successful person. Why can some people realize themselves and others not? What is the reason?
The whole point is in the upbringing and formation of a certain worldview of the growing personality. There is a very wise expression that the biggest success in life is successful children.
The article will discuss how to raise such a child so that he can realize himself and become happy.
Parenting problems
Parents are the main teachers laying the main life principles and the foundations of the worldview that the child then projects into adulthood. The main thing is not to follow the opinion of a society that is not interested in self-sufficient and self-confident personalities, but to listen to your child and his needs.
One simple rule should be remembered forever: a successful child is a person with normal self-esteem, happy, without complexes and fears that arise in childhood under the influence of mothers and fathers. Parents love obedient and calm children who do not take the initiative and do not defend their opinion. It is very convenient when the child is completely subordinate to the will of the parents. But this is for the time being.
Psychologists believe that problems and mistakes in upbringing not only negatively affect the psychological health of the child, but also provoke the development of physical diseases. To prevent this, it is necessary to change the consciousness of parents who raise their children on the principle of "will be as I said."
Parents carry echoes from their childhood into the process of education, that is, if the father grew up in a despot family, then there is a high probability that he will behave the same with his son.
Of course, there can be no talk of any success if the child grows up in an environment with an excess of aggression, if he is notorious and not confident in himself.
Parents need to pay attention to a number of problems that exist in modern society and are an obstacle to the development of success and usefulness in children:
- Computer technologies have a negative impact on education. It is easier for parents to distract the baby with newfangled phones and tablets than to read a book for him at night. The consequence of this is the lack of attention in childhood, which negatively affects the psyche of the baby.
- Compensation for the lack of attention and care by buying toys will lead to the depreciation of material things and increased demands.
- Obsessive help from parents. As a result, the child becomes uninitiated, unfit for life, and subsequently - helpless adults.
- The imposition of their views is usually characteristic of those parents who themselves have not succeeded in life and now show their abilities and pass on the experience to a small person.
- Unreadiness to accept responsibility for the child - as a result, the child receives less love and suffers due to the insolvency and irresponsibility of mom or dad.
The child must know and feel that they love him
A successful adult always has the right self-esteem. Parents need to show the child that they love him simply because he is, and that he is who he is. The child needs to speak the words of love as often as possible, hug him, respect all his aspirations. If it is time for him to go to bed while he is playing, he should not shout at him and send him to bed in an ordered tone, it is better to help him finish the game, and then go to bed with him. You can not criticize the baby, you need to criticize only actions.
The child must have the right to choose
Successful development of a child is possible only if you give him the right to a simple and banal choice. For example, in what he will go for a walk or what toy he will take with him on a trip. The child will see that his opinions are considered and listened to. With him you need to discuss films, cartoons, situations, books and always be interested in what he thinks about this or that occasion.
The child needs to be taught to negotiate
The ability to negotiate is a very useful quality when it comes to raising a successful child. It is necessary to teach him to express his thoughts on any issue. You should instill in him the ability to compromise and find solutions that would suit everyone. It is the ability to negotiate and find solutions in difficult situations that will help the child adapt in society.
Need to help your child find a favorite business.
Each person has his own abilities and talents. It is necessary to observe the child in order to identify the occupation that causes him the greatest interest, and try to develop him in this direction. The sooner you start development, the better for talent. In the future, he may not be engaged in this business, but the experience that he will accumulate during the lessons will always be useful to him in life.
Promotion of curiosity
All children are born geniuses, and the task of parents is to help the child realize himself. If he is interested in some activity, you need to maintain this interest. You should look for literature, educational games or films, write in a circle, section or class. For the successful development of a child, you cannot decide for him what he needs to do, and without which he can do. Any interest should be encouraged. Firstly, it broadens the mind. Secondly, perhaps this hobby can become a thing of his life.
Creative development
From early childhood, it is necessary to teach the child creativity, draw with him, compose songs, dance, make music. Creative abilities will be very useful to him in the future in solving problems and the most complex tasks.
Developing a sense of responsibility
The child should feel responsible for what he has done. But you can not scold him, you must try to find the best way out of the situation. It is important to show by your own example that you need to keep the word, and be able to answer for wrong actions.
His desire to keep his word and perform the actions that are expected of him at a certain time should be encouraged.
A child accustomed to responsibility from childhood is more likely to succeed than a child who does not know how to answer for his words and actions.
Love of reading
The child needs to instill a love of reading, preferably from an early age. Reading people are more successful and self-confident than those who spend all their free time on a TV or computer. First you need to read aloud, then pick up interesting literature for him according to his age.
If the child does not want to read, you can not force him to do it by force. You should find an approach to him and, by your example, show how interesting it is, buy him a book with his favorite characters.
The development of eloquence
If the child is trying to tell something, you can not dismiss him. On the contrary, one should enter into dialogue with him, give him the opportunity to express his thoughts, ask questions to which he can answer.
If it’s difficult for him, you need to help him with a hint, but you can’t speak for him, let him try to independently explain, describe, ask a question, answer a question.
The child’s desire to be friends with peers and other children should be encouraged. A successful child is an outgoing kid. You can not limit the communication of the child, in addition, without the need, it is better not to interfere in the relations of children. He must independently learn how to get out of situations; this will be very useful to him in the future.
The development of perseverance and determination
The child needs to be taught to set goals and achieve them, to show how to draw up a plan to achieve the goals and how to adjust it if necessary. You can help him cope with the difficulties that have arisen, but you can not perform an action for him. This is a “bear service”, which will lead to the fact that the child will wait all the time for outside help, instead of getting together and solving the problem.
You need to praise correctly
An important part of the parenting process is praise. You need to do it right. You should praise the baby for the desire to complete his task well, for the desire to develop, learn, for perseverance, patience, and the search for innovative solutions.
Praise is important to use in dosage. If he gets used to it, then its significance will lose its importance.
It is not fair to praise, it corrupts. The child ceases to try, because the meaning is lost in this, because they will still be praised.
Optimism
A successful person is an optimist in life. In any, even the worst situation, one should see something good, it is important for a successful and happy person. From an early age, the baby needs to explain that victories can be replaced by defeats, and this is normal, such is life. Parents themselves should be optimistic and demonstrate by their own example how to relate to problems.
It is necessary to teach the child to correctly perceive failures, that is, not to make of this tragedy, to be able to analyze the reasons and make the right decisions to correct the situation.
It is important that the child does not project failure on his personality. That is, if you did not take a place in the competition, this does not indicate that he is a loser, which means that he was simply poorly prepared. It is required to tell him that he will succeed the next time, only he needs to make more efforts.
Independence
From two years old, the child seeks to show independence. It is very good. It is necessary to give him the opportunity to do something without outside help and not rush him.
This desire should be encouraged in him, interested in his opinion, be sure to praise for trying to do something yourself. No need to immediately correct what the baby did wrong, it is better to help him finish it the way it should.
How to raise a successful person
Bringing up such qualities as humanity, determination, independence in a child, parents form a successful, self-confident personality. In addition, you should always remember that children imitate adults, so you need to educate yourself.
If mom always keeps her promise, father keeps in a difficult situation, then in the future the child will behave the same.
What should be paid special attention to, and what should not be allowed for the upbringing of a successful child to give a positive result?
- Parents need to learn how to perceive the child as a separate personality, for which they are characterized by their own view of things, their opinion, their self-esteem.
- We need to learn to maintain a moral distance, not to impose our opinions and tastes, especially if the child does not like it. Even a 2-year-old baby can say for sure which toys he likes and which not.
- Parents should support the initiative, these are the first steps in the development of independence in the child. Successful socialization will be faster and more painless if the child is more independent and self-confident. Let him eat very slowly or tie the shoelaces for half an hour, but these are important stages in the development of independence and willpower.
- Any manifestations of activity where he is trying to do something on his own should be encouraged. It is especially important to express support in the first years of the baby's life, it is during this period that adult behavior determines its nature.
- It is necessary to help the child set goals and develop an action plan with him.
- From 6-7 years old, it is necessary to begin to cultivate diligence and willpower, he is already able to control his emotions. It is imperative to teach your child to play sports. Physical activity develops self-discipline and self-control.
- By your own example, show how to achieve your goals. The main thing is to show consistency, always keep promises, work hard and enjoy the result of your work.
Which parents grow successful children
All parents dream that their children stay as far away from trouble as possible. Every dad and mother want the child to be successful at school, so that his peers do not offend him, so that he can achieve his goal. Unfortunately, there is no special guide for raising a successful and happy child. But psychologists say that most often these children grow up with successful parents.
So, what you need to become a parent in order to raise a successful person:
- It is necessary to teach your children socialization skills: communication with their peers, understanding their moods, feelings, helping others and solving their problems on their own. In the scientific literature, psychologists advise parents to instill the skills of successful adaptation of the child in any team.
- You need to expect a lot from the child and believe in him. For example, those mothers and fathers who expect that the child will receive higher education, as a rule, achieve their goal. They always bring him to this, and at a certain stage the child himself begins to want it.
- Successful children grow up in families where mothers work. Such children learn independence early, therefore they are better adapted to life than those babies whose mothers sit at home and do household chores.
- As a rule, successful and happy children grow up in families where parents have higher education.
- It is necessary to teach mathematics to children from an early age, and the sooner the better.
- It is important to establish good and warm relationships with children.
- It is necessary to value efforts, not fear of failure, to be optimistic in life.
Finally
The modern world is fleeting and volatile, children grow very fast. The main task of parents is to guide their baby in the right, right direction and instill in him strength of spirit, hard work, dedication, determination, optimism, faith in oneself and one's strength.
And the main thing that mothers and fathers should remember: a successful child is a happy and beloved child. You need to love the baby, even the most naughty and spoiled, to believe in him, to help him, and then he will succeed.