Boys begin to fall in love at the age of 12. Despite the fact that they find their first love a little later, at the age of 14-16, the memories of the very first girl, who attracted attention and excited the blood, remain for life. So whom do boys in the period before puberty choose as the subject of their adoration? Most often they fall in love with a teacher. Why this is happening, read below.
Why teachers are chosen as objects of adoration
With age, the body changes, hormones begin to be produced in it. They make both physiological and psychological changes. Testosterone is a hormone responsible for the development of male sexual characteristics, which begins to be actively produced from 12-14 years. All boys grow up at different times.
So why do students fall in love with a teacher? Because girls at 12 do not yet reach puberty. And the imagination of the boys is excited by the attractive forms of a young woman. Who do they see most often? That's right, a teacher at school. And if she is young and pretty, then it is her guys who choose the subject of their adoration. Less common are cases when 12 year old boys fall in love with the moms of their friends or girlfriends.
What are the signs of attention
People show their love in different ways. And even boys who are only in their teens demonstrate their feelings in various ways. Some worry quietly, love seething in their head. But some cannot be silent. The most daring of these individuals can confess their feelings to the teacher. And well, if this happens tête-à-tête. But often, boys confess their love to the whole class.
Of course, it’s not a shame to fall in love with a teacher, but then few people want to endure ridicule about this all school years. Therefore, the most intelligent children express their feelings on paper. They can throw anonymous notes to the teacher. And modern children can even annoy their beloved SMS or messages on social networks. Boys can give the teacher flowers or sweets, and some do not speak directly about feelings, they explain their gift with sincere gratitude for the knowledge they received.
How to behave a teacher
In such a situation, it is difficult not to get confused. Young teachers do not always know how to take signs of attention from students in love. This is not taught at the institute. Therefore, one has to be creative. Girls with the whole class can say that they have a lover, a guy, and their engagement is just around the corner. This is a good way to discourage annoying gentlemen. But it's better not to lie. If the engagement lasts for 5 years, the next generation of students will no longer believe in these tales.
Many boys can fall in love with a teacher at once. In order not to offend any of them, one does not need to rudely resign. But show kindness is also not worth it. Otherwise, students might think that they have a chance. The girl must strictly determine the scope of what is permitted and show the children who is in charge of the class. Yes, in such a situation it will not be possible to become a friend to everyone, but the number of fans of a strict teacher will quickly decrease.
How to discourage annoying gentlemen
The teacher should not lie to the students or give false hopes. The worst thing a girl can say to an inexperienced boy is “I'll think about it.” This is the phrase used by the heroines of romantic films that the student definitely saw. The best way to moderate the ardor of a boy is to nip the relationship in the bud. And if all the words are powerless, the teacher must change the attitude towards the whole class and make subordinates of friends. If the student begins to care for the teacher, then she can accept his good location without crossing the line. It’s always better to settle everything peacefully. Therefore, it is worth giving the boy his friendship, and if he does not require more, then you just need to wait time. Soon the “gentleman” will grow up and find a girlfriend by age.
How to conduct a student
A 12 year old boy has a hard time at school. His body changes, hormones begin to play, and, as a result, quarrels with parents occur. And here also a pretty woman looms before her eyes every day. How can a student behave so as not to disgrace himself in front of the class and object of his love? The boy should not zealously achieve victory at all costs. If he will bombard the teacher with messages, then as a result, the parents will be called to school, and the boy will be punished.
Therefore, if you write love letters, then secretly from the subject of adoration. The boy can express his tender feelings in the form of help. Gallant deeds will be appreciated by the woman. For example, you can open the door for a teacher, help her bring a heavy pile of textbooks. Of course, this will not provoke reciprocal feelings, since the subject of adoration can only give its student a friendly attitude towards him. But the young creature still does not know anything about love, so even this in his eyes will be a good reward for his labors.
Junior Cases
If a student falls in love with a teacher in the 5-6th grade, there is nothing to worry about. Cute notes, sweets and flowers for September 1 and March 8 are all that he can give to the object of his adoration. Let us give an example: a student of the 5th grade just moved to a new school and cannot make friends in the class, and the young teacher treats him well and helps in everything. Of course, the boy instantly makes an idol out of a girl. The student does not dare to confess his feelings, but everything is written on his face. In such a situation, you do not need to change your good attitude. The boy will soon find friends and change the subject of adoration. The situation will be corrected, and the friendship between the teacher and the student will remain.
High School Cases
What to do if a 10th grade student falls in love with a teacher? It is clear that at a very young age, feelings pass quickly, but for a 16-year-old teenager, a teacher may well become her first love. We give an example: a young teacher of mathematics lives together with her son, a girl dresses modestly, behaves in accordance with her status and teaches at the 11th grade. One boy, one must say capable, shows a special zeal for study. He goes to all additional classes and consultations for the exam. And then the young man guards the teacher near her house and declares his love. Moreover, it gives a chic bouquet of roses. The guy says that he is in love, understands the situation, is ready to take responsibility and agrees to take care of the girl’s son.
The situation is difficult, and you must immediately tell the student that nothing will work. Of course, you should not take flowers, so as not to give the guy unnecessary hopes. I must say that there are no reciprocal feelings and cannot be. Yes, the student will be hurt and offended, but he will cope with it. And if the teacher mumbles, the situation can only get worse. A boy can imagine that a girl is simply indecisive and shy. As a result, the student will continue his courtship with double enthusiasm.
Stories
Let's look at a few more examples of how you can get out of a situation when a teenager fell in love with an adult girl.
The guy with his parents moves to a new house. Accordingly, he had to change the school. Getting to know the neighbors on the porch, the boy notes a pretty girl. And then it turns out that she becomes his class teacher. The guy quickly finds a common language with her, but does not dare to tell her about feelings. And then it turns out that the teacher already has a gentleman who made her an offer. The guy begins to blame himself for indecision. He tells himself that if he was bolder, then the girl of his dreams could have got him, and not someone else.
Getting out of this situation is quite simple. If the child has revealed itself to you, just tell him that the girl chose the other not because he was bolder. The teacher had other selection criteria. Her fiance is older, he is wealthy and independent. And the boy is just a schoolboy. The student does not need to be upset, he will still find his love, just later, because everything should have its time.
And one more short story. A 16 year old boy fell in love with a teacher. She was not a qualified teacher, but a student in practice. But after two weeks of study, her lover disappears. The student is very suffering and does not know how to live on. All searches for her lover were in vain.
There is only one thing to advise a guy: try to get distracted, go in for sports, build mock-ups or program. In general, you need to direct the energy that goes to suffering, in the right direction. Love for an idol passes rather quickly if it does not find any way of expression.
And what remains to suffer?
Children are not tormented by their love. They sleep well at night, and do not go under the windows of their idol. The boy fell in love with a teacher, but with the same ease, a film actress could conquer his heart. And in both cases, he realizes in his soul that these feelings will remain unrequited. This is not the tragedy of life. Soon the student will grow up, his classmates will grow up, and then he will really fall in love and will suffer. The boy will begin to write serenades, buy flowers. And at age 12, the suffering is mostly fictitious. The student wants to feel like an adult and plays in love with the same eagerness as he plays in war.
Parent involvement
Mom and dad should take an active part in the life of their child. They need to know about teenage love. It is in this case that it will be easier for parents to understand what is happening with their child. You can support the child only with words and parting words. You can’t tell the young creature that he boggles his head, it would be better if he listened to what the teacher was saying to him, and did not admire her for days on end.
In such a situation, the support of the pope is important for the son. It is an adult man who must explain to his child that his feelings are a stage of growing up. A father can tell his son that he was once in love with his teacher, but then he met his mother, and now their family lives happily.
Specialists help
Psychologists say that a teenager fell in love with a teacher because of a lack of love in the family. If mom and dad do not devote enough time to the child, then he is trying to find a replacement on the side. And who is best able to replace parents if not a teacher? She takes care of the teenager, protects him from troubles, she can be joked with, and she does not scold for every mistake. This is an ideal option. Only the child does not understand the full depth of his feelings, so he says that he fell in love. Parents should not blame their child for this. They need to spend more time with their son to help him survive the first disappointment in life.