For every loving parent, the appearance of a child in the family is a huge joy and unlimited happiness. Every year the child grows, develops, learns new things, he develops a character, other age-related changes occur. However, the joy of parents is sometimes replaced by the perplexity and even confusion that they experience during the inevitable generational conflicts. You won’t be able to avoid them, but smoothing them out is quite possible. Psychologists and educators urge special attention to be paid to the upbringing and development of a child 3-4 years of life.
A question that is being addressed by dozens of specialists
The formation of personality and the maturation of character occurs from the very moment a person is born. Every day the baby learns the world around him, forms relationships with others, realizes his importance and place, and at the same time he has completely natural desires and needs. This development does not go smoothly, and critical situations and conflicts occur with a certain periodicity and have similar moments at each age. This is what allowed psychologists to formulate such a concept as age-related crises. Not only young parents, but also experienced grandparents who consider themselves to be experienced, will not hurt to find out what the upbringing of the child is (3-4 years). Psychology, expert advice and the recommendations of those who have experienced these tips will help smooth out collisions of crumbs with representatives of the adult world.
Checking parents for a fortress
At the age of three and four years, a little man is no longer doing everything according to the orders of adults, but a well-formed individual, with his own emotions and desires. Sometimes these desires do not completely coincide with the established adult rules, and trying to achieve their goal, the child begins to show character, or, as adults say, to be capricious. There can be any reason: not the spoon for food, not the juice that you wanted a minute ago, not purchased toy and so on. For parents, these reasons seem insignificant, and the only way they see is to overcome the desire of the crumbs, make him do what they want and are used to doing. Parenting children 3-4 years old sometimes just requires incredible patience from others.
Is your child three years old? Be patient
Self-awareness as part of the world does not go smoothly for the child, and this is quite normal. Realizing that he is also a man, the kid is trying to understand what he can do in this world and what he should do in each individual case. And these tests begin with a check on the strength of the parents. After all, if they say what needs to be done, so why shouldn't he, the most important person in the family, give orders? What if they obey! He begins to change, his worldview, habits are changing. At this time, parents notice that their baby is not only listening and crying, but already commanding them, requires one or another item. This period is called a crisis of three years. What to do? How to cope with the most beloved little man and not offend him? Features of the upbringing of children 3-4 years old directly depend on the age-specific features of development.
Causes of Conflict, or How to Smooth a Crisis
Currently, adults pay little attention to their children: a busy schedule, life, problems, loans, important matters do not leave the opportunity to just play. Therefore, the child is trying to attract attention. After several attempts to talk with mom or dad, he goes unnoticed and, therefore, begins to indulge, scream, and arrange tantrums. After all, the child does not know how to properly build a dialogue, and begins to behave as he can, so that he would be paid attention faster. It is in understanding the needs of the crumbs that the upbringing of the child (3-4 years) is in many ways. Psychology, advice and recommendations of specialists will help to understand, and therefore solve, problems associated with a lack of attention.
Just like an adult
Often, parents themselves, not wanting to, cause negative emotions in the child: they make them sleep when they want to play, eat “not very tasty” soup, remove their favorite toys, and leave home for a walk. Thus, the baby has a desire to harm adults and protest. Moral education of children 3-4 years old should take place with a constant positive example from adults.
Patience is the key to success
During this period, parents realize that their child has already matured, but still remains small and cannot cope with all the tasks himself. And when the baby strives to be independent, his parents continually correct him, pull him off, teach him. Of course, he takes hostility with criticism and protests in every possible way. Mom and dad need to be patient and be as gentle as possible in relation to the child. The upbringing of children 3-4 years old lays the foundation for the relationship of babies with others for life. It depends on the parents what these relationships will be.
Parenting 3-4 years old
Behavioral psychology is a science, but with regard to children it is necessary to study at least its basic principles.
- The child imitates the behavior of adults around him. Naturally, first of all, he takes an example from his parents. We can say that at this age the baby absorbs everything like a sponge. He has not yet formed his own concepts of good-bad. Well, the way parents behave. If everyone in the family communicates without screaming and scandals, the child also chooses a calm tone for his behavior and tries to copy his parents. To find a common language with children 3 and 4 years old is necessary in a gentle manner, unobtrusively, without elevated tones.
- As often as possible, you need to show your love for the child, because children are very sensitive and vulnerable creatures. Their whims, misconduct, bad behavior should not affect the degree of love of parents - just love and do not demand anything in return. The tasks of raising a child 3-4 years old are just a reminder for parents, the experience of their predecessors. You need to feel your child with your heart, and not bring up as it is written in the book.
- Do not compare the behavior of your child with the behavior of other children, and moreover, do not say that he is worse than someone. With this approach, self-doubt, complexes and isolation can develop.
- The child is trying to be independent, more and more often from him you can hear the phrase "I myself", at the same time he expects support from adults and praise. Therefore, parents need to approve of children's independence (to praise for the removed toys, for putting on clothes, etc.), but in no case to follow the child’s lead and determine the boundaries of what is allowed in time.
- During the formation of the character and growing up of the child, it is important for the parents themselves to follow certain rules, the daily routine. Moms and dads, together with grandparents, need to agree on the same methods of education and not deviate from such tactics. As a result, the child will understand that not everything is possible for him - you need to obey the general rules. The main tasks of raising children 3-4 years old are determined by their parents, only you need to remember the importance of this age period.
- Talk on equal terms with a small person and behave as you do with adults. Do not infringe on his rights, listen to his interests. If the child is guilty, condemn his misconduct, not the child himself.
- Hug your children as often as possible. Regarding and without reason - this way they will feel safe, grow up confident. The child will know that mom and dad love him, no matter what.
Get ready for experimentation
Parents should understand that raising a child (3-4 years old), psychology, advice and recommendations of specialists - all this is very important, but you also need to determine for yourself the facets that will be allowed to the baby. At the age of 3-4 years, a little researcher is interested in everything: he can turn on a TV or a gas stove himself, taste the earth from a flower pot, climb on a table. This list can be continued for a very long time, three-year and four-year-olds are quite curious, and this is absolutely normal. On the contrary, one should be wary when the child does not show such interest in the environment. However, it is necessary to determine what the child can experience for himself, and what will be categorically prohibited.
Want to ban something? Do it right
Children should be informed about these prohibitions correctly, without unnecessary trauma for them. The child must understand when he crosses the boundaries of what is permitted, what is possible and what is not allowed, how to behave with peers and in society. It is impossible not to establish prohibitions, since a sweet child will grow up selfish and uncontrollable. But everything should be in moderation, a huge number of prohibitions on everything can lead to indecision and isolation. It is necessary to try not to provoke conflict situations, if the baby sees sweets, he, of course, wants to try them. Conclusion - put them further in the cabinet. Or he wants to take a crystal vase, similarly - hide. For a certain time, remove the objects especially desired by the child, and eventually he will forget about them. Raising a child (3-4 years) requires a lot of strength and patience during this period.
Psychology, tips and tricks
All parental prohibitions must necessarily be justified, the child must clearly understand why you can’t do this anyway.
We can say that after overcoming the crisis of three years in children there are noticeable positive changes in character. They become more independent, focused on details, active, have their own point of view. Also, relations with parents are moving to a new level , conversations become more meaningful, and interest in cognitive and substantive activities is shown.
Replenish Knowledge
The questions that the baby asks are sometimes able to confuse even an adult who is confident in his education. However, this baby should not be shown in any case. Even the most “uncomfortable” questions need to be taken for granted and be prepared to explain everything that interests him in a way that is accessible to the child.
Raising a child is an important and main task of parents, you need to be able to notice changes in the character and behavior of the baby in time and respond correctly to them. Love your children, take the time to answer all of their “why” and “why,” take care, and then they will listen to you. After all, his entire adult life depends on the upbringing of the child at this age. And remember: it’s impossible to pass a practical exam on the topic “Psychology of raising children 3-4 years old”, but to reduce them to a minimum is in your hands.