Specialists attribute nightly fears in a child to a widespread group of sleep disorders. Many parents have encountered their manifestation in their baby at least once in their life. Most of all, children are afraid of bad dreams, darkness, the absence of a mother nearby, as well as loneliness.
Nightly fears in a child occur most often between the ages of 3 to 13 years. According to available data, up to 50% of babies suffer from such an unpleasant phenomenon. The most pronounced night fears in a child of 3 years. What are the causes of such an unpleasant phenomenon and how to eliminate it once and for all?
When does this happen?
Nightly fears should be distinguished from nightmares. The second of them come to a person during the active phase of sleep, that is, in the second half of the night. That is why, after waking up, he continues to remember their content. The opposite picture is observed with nightly fears. They come during the slow phase, almost immediately after the baby falls asleep, and therefore are not remembered.
The rise with nightly fears in a child occurs with chaotic movements and screams. After this, the baby does not calm down for another 15-40 minutes. During the activation of nightly fears in children, Komarovsky (a famous pediatrician) indicates that the child continues to sleep. That is why he does not recognize loved ones. And in the morning, the baby is not able to remember what happened.
Psychologists believe that nightly fears in a child are a completely natural phenomenon. It is due to the completion of the central nervous system formation process. And only in the case when attacks of nightly fear in children are repeated often, parents need to consult a specialist with their child. Consider the causes of this unpleasant phenomenon in children of different ages.
1 to 3 years
The sleep of babies in this age period is usually very deep. Those plots and pictures that come to them during a night's rest are simply erased from memory. That is why after awakening, the crumbs do not remember their dreams. Because of this, no attacks of night fear in children at this age are observed. It can be difficult to fall asleep at times. But at this age, this is due to an overly active day, full of impressions. In addition, such children practically do not distinguish sleep from reality. Sometimes they wake up and cry only because they are not able to give themselves an explanation for the change in the situation, which may be caused, for example, by the fact that after the games in the sun the baby was suddenly left alone in a dark room. But after the children find their mother near them, they quickly calm down and immediately fall asleep.
3 to 4 years
The first nightly fears in a child appear at a time when his brain completes the process of its formation. At this time, babies have a separation of reality and sleep.
At 3-4 years old, nightly fears in a child are associated with his fear of the dark, as well as with the violent activity of fantasy. In his imagination, the brain of a little man draws pictures of shadows that begin to be seen, for example, as a terrible fairy-tale monster. It crawls out from behind the closet and is ready to grab the baby with its furry huge paw. In this case, the child is unlikely to succeed.
5 to 7 years
During this period of the child’s life, his socialization occurs. At the age of 5-7 years, nightly fears in children are associated with this process. This is the period when the kids begin to actively seek, as well as defend their own place in society. The recognition of others becomes extremely important for them. The child may worry about a quarrel with friends. His thoughts, for example, about tomorrow’s performance at the festive matinee, etc., also disturb him.
Starting from the age of 5, nightly fears of a child are often associated with experiencing a conflict situation with their mother. To prevent them, all negative aspects must be resolved. Otherwise, the baby will think that his mother has stopped loving him and will never love him again.
At this age, the kids are worried about the implementation of those still minimal social functions that are assigned to them in this period. Among them are joint games, performing simple housework, etc. In case of any failure during these simple processes, it is possible to have a negative impact on the psyche of the baby. This will certainly affect his dream.
7 to 9 years old
If night fears in children at the age of 6 are associated with adaptation in society, then after entering school new anxieties and phobias arise. They are formed due to a new environment and training.
Nightly fears in 7-year-old children are caused by the fact that at this age, schoolchildren are not yet able to completely control their own emotions. And this is especially pronounced during a period of severe congestion.
Alarming thoughts about school torment children, as a rule, up to the age of 9. In the evening, the child begins to rethink the whole day he has lived. And sometimes he is not always able to cope with surging emotions, especially with a heavy load.
That is why it is important for parents to notice in time for their child the first signs of overwork and plan his day based on individual characteristics and age.
Around this period, children begin to realize that life on earth is not eternal. This arouses in them the fear of death. They may be afraid, for example, that they will fall asleep in the evening and do not wake up in the morning. A child’s fear also arises from the likelihood that parents will die and be left alone. Recognizing such fear is often quite difficult. The fact is that children do not like to talk about this. But it is worth bearing in mind that psychologists consider this phenomenon to be quite normal.
The symptoms of fears in children at 9 years of age are somewhat changing. In this age period, more significant and global causes lead to anxiety. In addition to the fear of the onset of death of their parents and schoolchildren are afraid to be alone in a world overflowing with strangers and evil people. Also, these children have concerns because of the likelihood that they will not be able to adapt in society, as well as because of self-doubt. At the age of 9, the child begins to fear catastrophes, wars, violence, etc.
Adolescence
High school students experience nightly fears due to other problems. Their experiences are connected with the fear of passing exams, the correct choice of a future profession, etc. In addition, young people undergo puberty during adolescence, and guys sometimes experience because of the complexity of relationships with girls, and vice versa. Children from 12 to 16 years old are often anxious about their own social status.
In addition, adolescents strive everywhere and in everything to prove themselves only from the best side. The possibility of failure creates fear in them. Self-doubt prevents such children from communicating normally with their peers.
When does it go?
As they grow older, some childhood fears are replaced by others. All this indicates the passage of the natural stages of development of the psyche of the baby. However, many parents are still interested to know when the nightly fears and nightmares of their children disappear. Experts say that it is impossible to name the exact age, since everything is purely individual.
If parents will correctly react to such phenomena, then by the age of 9-10, most children can sleep peacefully in a separate room. However, sometimes this period is delayed. Nightly fears may be present in the life of a child up to 12 years or more. All this can develop into real phobias. And here, the child will certainly need the help of a specialist.
The nature of fears
Nocturnal fear will never arise in a child just like that. It is due to a number of factors and reasons, among which:
- difficult course of pregnancy;
- heredity;
- pathology of childbirth;
- severe pathologies;
- operations, especially if they were performed under general anesthesia;
- lack of close emotional relationships with mom;
- mental trauma;
- excess of impressions;
- neuropsychic overload;
- unfavorable family atmosphere;
- nervous state of parents, frequent conflicts between them, as well as aggressive behavior with children.
The main sources of fear in babies are certain events in their lives, such as:
- moving to another place of residence;
- conflict on the street, at school and in kindergarten;
- transition to a new children's educational institution;
- birth in the family of a second child;
- divorce of parents;
- death of loved ones.
A huge source of negative information is modern television with its criminal chronicles, programs about violence, incidents and disasters.
Symptoms of fears
Not every child who is afraid of the dark will complain to adults. Sometimes children are shy about telling this to their dads and mothers. That is why psychologists advise parents to pay attention to the mood of their offspring, as well as the following symptoms:
- unwillingness to go to bed;
- please leave the lights on in the room;
- difficulty falling asleep even when the child is with mom.
Sometimes it seems to parents that there is some kind of obstacle that does not allow the baby to relax. In fact, it is the reason that the child cannot go through the slumber stage. If this happens, then he will sleep peacefully until morning awakening.
See a doctor
How to rid a child of nightly fears? As a rule, parents themselves can help their children. However, in certain cases, fathers and mothers should immediately contact a specialist. You will need a doctor's consultation:
- with prolonged attacks of nightly fears;
- inadequate condition of the child when he begins to twitch and talk incoherently;
- intensification of negative phenomena.
Parents should be alert in other cases. For example, with the convulsive readiness of children during night terrors or with nervous tics, rolling their eyes, protruding their tongues, abrupt movements of their heads, twitching of their shoulders, attacks of suffocation, etc. The manifestation of the above symptoms is the reason for urgent medical attention for diagnosis and prescription treating children from nightly fears with the help of drugs, as well as classes with a psychologist.
Problem identification
In preschool children, as well as in primary school students, anxiety can be detected using one of the methods proposed by children's psychologists. The most popular of them is the diagnosis carried out according to the system of M. Panfilova and A. Zakharov. It is called "Fears in the houses."
The child is invited to draw two houses. One of them should be depicted in black pencil, and the second in red. When the drawings are ready, the specialist offers his little patient to play a game. Her condition is the resettlement of all fears in the houses. The scariest of them should be placed in the black house, and the fearless - in red. During classes, the specialist must constantly monitor the child in order to assess the number of drawings that will indicate the most terrible fears. This will allow the psychologist to determine the further course of the classes and which correction methods will be most effective in this case.
The specialist may ask the child to draw a lock on the door of the black house. This will allow the little patient to understand that he is safe, because all his fears are locked.
Psyche correction
In order to rid a child of nightly fears, it is necessary first of all to establish contact with him. This will allow the specialist to identify the signs and causes of the problem. Parents should also help overcome child anxiety. What methods are recommended to be used?
- Game therapy. The advantage of this technique is that the child does not fully understand what is happening. He just plays with his parents or with a psychologist. The task of adults in this case is to create such conditions that they cause fear in the baby, and then you need to help him cope with the negative situation.
- Painting. This method of diagnosis and further correction of fears is considered the most effective both among preschoolers and among students of educational institutions. During drawing classes, children transfer their feelings and emotions to paper. In this case, the specialist must identify the fear visualized by the patient and designate it in a humorous form. This will fix the problem.
- Sand therapy. This is one of the techniques of art therapy. It allows you to relieve stress, as well as identify the fears of the child and fight them.
- Puppet therapy and fairy tale therapy. When using these techniques, the specialist needs to come up with a story according to which the selected character overcomes his fear with one way or another of suppressing it.
In addition to the above methods of eliminating fears, psychologists can use various trainings. No less effective will be classes with tests and questionnaires.
For older children, conversations are more suitable. But they need to be carried out only if the child is open for contact with a specialist. In this case, the doctor can apply such techniques and methods:
- Interpretation. It allows the child to eliminate his fears by suggesting the rationalization of negative thoughts.
- Response. The main goal of this technique is to create an artificial environment during which the expression of negative emotions occurs.
- Desensitization. With the help of these exercises, the mechanism for eliminating fear is developed during periodic meetings with him.
- Containerization. Identifying the causes of the negative phenomenon and eliminating some of their symptoms will be much easier if the patient's parents participate in the course of therapy. The specialist will give them the necessary advice that will allow you to most effectively and quickly eliminate fear in the child.
Drug therapy
Treatment with drugs can eliminate many of the symptoms that torment the child. But it should be borne in mind that such therapy is secondary. The main task in eliminating the negative phenomenon is the correction of the psyche.
Doctors prescribe pills only to relieve depression, tension and other manifestations of asthenia. In such cases, the child is recommended vitamins, calcium preparations, mild antidepressants, nootropic drugs, as well as sedatives (with high excitability) and tranquilizers (with hyposthenia). Taking medications should be combined with physiotherapy and individual work with a child psychologist.
Consolidation of results
How to make night fears never return to the child? For this, parents need to create a favorable atmosphere in the family and spend more time with the baby (especially if he is 3-5 years old). At the same time, it is very important that children constantly feel their own safety. Joint cognitive and entertaining games can help in this. In addition, it is important for parents to stop bullying children, using this technique as a method of education. Indeed, it is often because of this that nightly fears arise.
Dads and mothers also should not assure their child that there is nothing to be afraid of. Psychologists consider this approach incorrect. The child must be taught to overcome difficulties. Total control and hyperprotection can cause new phobias.
Thematic literature
Specialists in the field of children's mental health often rely on the recommendations and explanations given in Alexander Zakharov’s book “Day and Night Fears in Children”. In this work, for the first time in world and domestic practice, the main causes of the appearance and further development of anxiety were considered. The author cited statistical data on the incidence of day and night fears in children, indicating the influence of various factors on them, the most important of which are family relationships. The book is written from the point of view of a child psychologist and pediatrician. It will be useful to read it to parents.