Just becoming a parent, you begin to understand how difficult it is to raise children! Moreover, in one family there are completely different children, and those methods of exposure that worked with one child are completely useless with another.
Psychologists are putting forward more and more theories about how to properly educate children.
The theory of temperaments was put forward by the ancient Greek physician and philosopher Hippocrates and the Roman physician Gallen. In the 20th century, they became widespread in the West, serious research was conducted on temperaments in terms of child psychology.
What is temperament?
These are the characteristics of a person’s personality, based on the work of his nervous system. It does not change over time, but as one grows up, a person is able to learn to restrain himself in some cases and, conversely, to show brighter, previously inherent reactions to certain events. Temperament does not affect the abilities and mind of children. But it should be borne in mind that some vital issues are more easily resolved by a choleric, and others, on the contrary, by a phlegmatic or sanguine person.
Temperament Impact
What does the type of temperament influence:
- The speed and intensity of the mental reaction.
- Speech of the child, gestures and facial expressions.
- Behavior at home and in society.
- Character.
There are many theories about the varieties of temperament developed by psychologists in different countries.
Types of temperaments
Let us dwell on a system that divides a person’s temperament into four types:
- Melancholic.
- Phlegmatic person.
- Sanguine.
- Choleric.
In order to choose the most appropriate tactics of communication and education of the baby, it is desirable to determine his temperament. This is easy to do with the help of modern tests, which are available in large enough quantities on the Internet. Or you can just carefully watch your baby, having previously studied the information about the types of children's nature.
In this article we will talk about the features and education of choleric children. But you need to take into account the fact that the "pure" type of temperament can be met extremely rarely. Usually human emotionality has a combination of different types with the predominance of one of them. So, it is quite possible to meet a child choleric sanguine. This means that in a small person there are traits of two types of character, and in some cases three or four, but with a predominance of one main species. For example, even a child is a melancholic choleric, and, raising him, one should take into account the strengths and weaknesses of both temperaments.
Features of temperaments
For a more complete understanding, we give a brief description of all types of temperament.
- Melancholic. This is a shy and shy kid. He loves silence and familiar surroundings. Such a child is attached to his mother and home, and distrusts everything new. A melancholic is able to subtly feel the mood and emotions of other people, but at the same time he is easily upset and often sad. These are contemplative children who do not accept loud sounds and the hustle and bustle of the world.
- Phlegmatic person. The main feature of such a baby is calm always and in everything. This patient and balanced little man will always finish the work he has begun. He does not like to conflict, but at the same time he is ready to stubbornly defend his interests. The saying applies to him: "Think seven times, and do it once." That is, this child first thinks, and then acts. It can be difficult to convince him; he has his own opinion on everything. He does not have unfulfilled homework, but they are done slowly.
- Sanguine. These are children, the sun, it is about them that they say "perfect baby." Sanguine people are funny and nimble, but in moderation. They are often in a good mood, such kids do not like to be sad, they are cheerful and cheerful. Sanguine easily finds new friends, and he is always surrounded by a group of fans. He can easily switch from one business to another, for example, for forty minutes he sat quietly in class and studied, and after a call he easily runs to have fun at a break.
- The choleric child has the brightest type of temperament and the most difficult to correct character. Consider this type of temperament in more detail.
Characteristics of a Choleric Child
This baby is easy to distinguish from others, he always and everywhere attracts the attention of others. He has a loud and sonorous voice, active facial expressions and gestures. He laughs contagiously, and after a second sobs sobbing. Even ordinary passersby pay attention to these children, because they are always at the center of any event. Such kids love noisy games with a lot of people. Choleric is a leader and instigator.
What is inherent in choleric
Pros of choleric children:
- Leadership skills. A small person strives and knows how to be a leader like no one else. From a very young age, these children realize that they want to command and be the first in any games. Loud, emotionally rich speech and active facial expressions only add bonuses to their desire to be the first in everything. They are able to give all their energy to what is interesting to them, and often succeed. But only if they do not burn out before the end of the process.
- Activity. Once the choleric has learned to walk, he can no longer be stopped. It begins to seem to parents that their baby has time to be in several places at the same time. He runs all day, tirelessly, jumps, climbs on closets, Swedish walls and tumbles. Such children are not threatened with physical inactivity and obesity in the future.
- Sociability. They will never be alone, because they easily make new friends and find friends.
- Increased adaptability is a big plus for choleric children. It will not be a problem for them to get used to a new school or neighbors in the yard.
- Determination. These children do not doubt their decisions and chosen tactics.
Negative qualities
Cons of choleric children:
- The flip side of leadership is increased aggressiveness. A child can often try to gain credibility among peers through aggressive behavior. Not necessarily it will be a fight, aggression is manifested through swear words or a high degree of conflict.
- Short temper leads to frequent conflicts not only in childhood, but also in adulthood. Where the phlegmatic man is silent, and the sanguine laughs at the situation, the choleric will make a full-fledged scandal.
- Inability to control oneself at preschool and early school age. Overwhelming emotions capture the child so much that he loses control over his feelings. At such moments, public opinion is not important for him, the kid can arrange a tantrum in a crowded place. Parents at such moments are encouraged to simply wait out the storm, not paying attention to the reproachful or even accusing views of others. But the older the baby becomes, the better it turns out to act based on the norms of behavior accepted in society.
Raising a choleric child
Parenting is a complex process. Parents will have to work hard and earn the unconditional respect of their crumbs, so that he begins to at least listen to them. But the authoritarian method of education is not suitable for such children. Before shouting and severely punishing a choleric, remember that nothing can make a calm and obedient child out of a bully. You can correct the behavior for several years, but you can’t change the type of temperament and nervous reactions.
The characteristics of a child's choleric are such that it is unlikely that he will be able to be an excellent student in school. But not because he is not smart enough, but because it is extremely difficult to do what he is not interested in.
Approach to such a child
Recommendations for dealing with choleric:
- Energetic children can perfectly prove themselves in sports. For choleric children, active sports such as football, dance or rock climbing can be a recommendation. For children with increased aggressiveness, any type of struggle will help throw out the negative.
- Alternate active activities with quiet games aimed at improving perseverance. Puzzles are perfect for kids, for older kids lotto or chess. Popularity is gaining such a direction as robotics. Such a hobby will help the choleric not only develop attention, but also teach him how to finish the job, strive for the goal, and not leave everything in half the way.
- A great hobby for a choleric can be photographing or drawing. In addition to pedagogical functions, such classes will be a good foundation for the future of your child.
- To teach the baby to finish the job it is necessary to start already from an early preschool age. If the little choleric does not want to completely color the picture or assemble a difficult puzzle, do it with him so that the baby sees the result.
- Try not to scream at your baby. Moreover, do not beat him. This will make it clear to an aggressive enough child that fighting and cursing is perfectly acceptable. The best punishment for him will be a silent reproach on your part. But still do not put the baby to sleep without first reconciling. This is dangerous for the child’s fragile psyche, and especially for choleric prone to overexcitation.
- Explain to your child how important it is to restrain your impulses. If in the sandbox for a broken Easter cake another child just sprinkles sand on it, then at school age negative outbreaks can lead to fights and injuries. Calmly and benevolently say what you had to do in certain circumstances. Teach him polite phrases and words with the help of which he will be able to communicate with other children in a conflict situation. Try to do this in private, without spectators, and do not use words such as “ashamed” or “ugly”. If the baby was able to resolve the conflict without the use of aggression and violence, be sure to sincerely praise him and pay attention to significant points.
- You can use psychological methods of behavior correction, such as fairy tales and game therapy. Invent yourself stories with your child in the title role, in which he behaves calmly and with restraint, and in the end he will be encouraged. Also in stores there is a lot of literature on this topic.
The love and recognition of parents is important to any children. Accept your child choleric as he is, and in return you will receive more than you expect.