Parents always want their children to be better than themselves. But some people are too zealous in their quest. Parents of this type take care of children, do not give them a pass, and as a result, they grow up a helpless and notorious creature. There are other types. Parents who want to become friends with their children seem ideal to many. But this is also not the best development of events. In this case, the kids grow up in selfish and overly demanding personalities. And there is a type that can be attributed to the golden mean.
Characteristic
Types of parents are diverse, but they all have one thing in common - love for children. As they say in an orphanage, a bad mother is better than a good nanny. The statement is controversial, but still it should be understood that a full-fledged child can grow up only in a complete family. How is the type of parents formed and what is it? Any person who has grown up in a full-fledged family is well aware of the process of education. The kid sees the attitude of his father and mother and, growing up, he understands what elements of education he likes and which ones not. Based on this, an adult draws conclusions about how to raise children. Typically, the example of parenting greatly affects the individual. A person can follow three development schemes: repeat the example of his parents, become the opposite of his parents, or consciously approach problems and make the right decision. The last type is less common than the rest. Therefore, we will analyze the two most common.
Types of Parents
Children consider adults their friends and mentors. But not all parents responsibly approach their mission. What psychological types of parents exist?
- Too caring. Such persons constantly take care of their child. Of the two types of parents, this is the worst, because such behavior does the most harm to the psyche of the baby. Mothers of a similar character warehouse run after the child across the playground, do not let him fall, and if the child scratches his finger, they call an ambulance. Such education quickly pays off. The child becomes cowardly and selfish. The kid is used to being taken care of and that, at his first whim, he fulfills all the requirements.
- Conservatives. A similar type of education is characteristic of Russia. Moms and dads of this kind of temperament forget that they were once children, at the moment when they become parents. Adults are trying to recoup their children. Toddlers of this type of parents grow notorious. They do not have their desires and ambitions, because as soon as they appear, they are immediately suppressed.
Parenting styles
Each of the types of parents uses its own approach to education. What styles are used more often than others?
- Authoritarian. One of the parents in the family is an authority. Everyone obeys him. Most often, a similar style of education is inherent in the military. A man who is used to commanding at work will continue to do so at home. Children must walk along the line, study at five and fulfill all the requirements of parents. The child will be well done when he meekly obeys and does not ask again. The opinion of toddlers and even adolescents is not taken into account. Parents are simply not interested.
- Authoritative. This is a classic parenting style. Parents are idols and role models for their children. Intellectual dad works at a prestigious job. Mom also works, but not for replenishment of the family budget, but more for pleasure. Children do all the housework, but they can always do it at a time convenient for them. Parents do not forbid their kids to walk if they arrive home on time, manage to do homework and say where they went. Adults support the aspirations of the child and help in their implementation.
- Liberal. This parenting style implies that parents and children will be friends. Adults do not make themselves authority, they communicate with children on an equal basis. Such a parenting style requires complete frankness, which helps parents solve children's problems as soon as they appear.
Types of education
The process of education is a complex combination of the development of skills, moral values and knowledge. What types of parenting do parents have?
- Demanding. Such parents want their children to study “excellently” and always and in everything be leaders. The mother will scold her son for four, and even in the case when the whole class, except for him, received three. Demanding will be manifested in the fact that parents will forbid the child to walk until he learns and retells all the lessons, and also does not work with tutors and at all the circles that he attends.
- Criticizing. A similar type of upbringing is found in people with low self-esteem. Lovers of criticism are usually not very much and like to do something on their own. They are pleased to find mistakes and mistakes of others. Parents can not always help their child with the solution of some difficult task, but they will not fail to note the stupidity of their child.
- Suspended. Such parents do not consider it necessary to meddle in the affairs of the child. They think that the child will independently cope with all the difficulties that have fallen on his shoulders. They will not care much about unfulfilled homework or poor grades. Such parents adhere to the rule "whatever happens is for the better."
What prevents parents from raising?
- Underdevelopment of parental feelings. Young parents do not always understand that they are already parents. People want to take a walk, look at this world and self-determine in life. For this reason, parents do not give the child the necessary attention and allow the baby to develop independently.
- Fear of losing a child. Mothers who could not find their calling can spend their whole lives on raising and educating the child. They will be afraid that the child will ever leave them, for this reason they may impose an inferiority complex on the child so that he stays with his mother’s skirt for as long as possible.
- The projection of negative qualities. Each person has not only positive, but also negative aspects of personality. It is they who irritate the person most of all in other people, as well as in their own child. But a child is a copy of his parents, and one should not be surprised that he will have the same complexes and manners.
- Low self-esteem. People with low self-esteem can come off on their child. Indeed, for the baby, parents are authority. Therefore, people who could not be realized in life will try to be realized in the family, which often leads to hyper-custody.
Attitude to education
How to find out what type of parents are? Look at their behavior throughout the day. If the mother takes care of the child too much - this is a manifestation of hypercare. If parents do not pay attention to the fun of the child, then this is detachment. A simple test is observing adults when a child falls. If the behavior is inadequate, then it is clear that parents must undergo a course of psychological assistance. A specialist can help mother and father get rid of their complexes and thereby make life easier for their child. After all, only individuals who are self-confident and well aware of where they are going to have a chance to raise adequate children.
Manifestation of love
Different types of parents express their feelings in different ways. The three most common ways:
- In words. Parents constantly tell the children that they are the best, they are angels sent from above. Most often, adults turn to the child not by name, but by an affectionate nickname: the sun, a kitten, a bunny.
- In gestures. This way of expressing love is characteristic of mothers. They can often hug, kiss, and stroke the baby. Gestures show care, affection and love.
- In practice. Parents can show their love in that they surround the child with care. They will buy him the desired toys, drive him to recreational activities, make excursions and go on picnics.
Qualities of a Good Parent
The type of parent-child relationship depends on many factors. Nevertheless, adults must monitor their behavior and be able to control it. Any type of parents can be ideal if adults show their positive qualities correctly. What exactly is this expressed in?
- Care. Parents should protect their child from troubles, but within reasonable limits.
- Love. Good parents love their child, whatever it is.
- The trust. Reasonable parents build their relationship with the child on mutual trust.
- Be an example. Parents should, by their own example, show the child how to behave.