Every family is familiar with a situation when a period of time comes for a naughty teenager. This is the transitional age of the child. It is important not to miss it, so as not to encounter problems in more serious formats in the future. After all, I want the child to understand the events in life, perceive everything correctly and be able to use the advice of older people.
How to raise a teenager? This is the most pressing and important issue that arises in every family with children. Most often, parents begin their upbringing by explaining why the child’s behavior is wrong and how this will threaten him in the future. But in most cases, ordinary educational conversations and conversations will not give any result. And the upbringing of difficult adolescence stops at this, because parents think that they are not able to fight this behavior. But who, no matter how dad and mom should help the child and guide him in the right direction?
Building habits and skills
About how to properly educate adolescents, you can hear from any psychologist. Most scientists have hypothesized that the brain of a child is very plastic. And from childhood, it will change from external events, factors. The child will adapt to a particular situation. And on the basis of this, habits and skills that will be difficult to reverse in the future will form.
With age, the brain is no longer so plastic, but it can develop. And this is the key point to use. Therefore, it is important not to miss the moment of correcting behavior in adolescence. After all, sometimes it happens that this period is the last chance to create and strengthen the teenager’s nervous system, the correct manners of his behavior. All this will affect the future life of your growing child.
Sensitivity and emotionality of teenage children
The question of how to raise teenage children is asked by every ordinary parent. It is important to know that at this age children become very sensitive, subject to frequent emotional breakdowns. All this happens in their head. This is precisely the danger, because how the brain actively works and what happens there, it is immediately impossible to understand. In adolescents, the part of the brain that is responsible for emotions is activated. The matter is compounded by the fact that the part of the brain that contributes to the adoption of sound decisions is only developing. Hence the impulsive behavior, and mood swings, and much, much more.
It is necessary to figure out in advance how to properly educate adolescents so that then there are no problems. For each child, it is necessary to select an individual approach that will suit specifically his character, behavior.
Ways of bringing up exposure
The child often wants to experience some joy, some emotions. But children do not always understand that emotions can be not only positive, but also negative. Therefore, in the case of negative feelings or a negative situation, the teenager will not be able to do the right thing. It is important for parents to know what are the ways to educate children and adolescents. At least five different methods can be distinguished:
- conviction;
- exercises and trainings;
- learning process;
- incentive method;
- Be sure to monitor and evaluate behavior.
Each of these methods should be manifested from the educating person, since he will influence the child by various methods. There are several important positions in pedagogy. Initially, with the help of correct speech, explanations of a particular situation are presented. After that, there is control over how the teenager understood the words and what conclusion he draws. And in the end, you must give an assessment of his behavior.
The first way is to convince our teenagers
To educate, understand, love - these are the three components that any parent must use. At the time of the educational conversation, it is necessary to bring such arguments that will become the main points and will keep the adolescent's attention specifically on the situation that has arisen. The method of persuasion is the ability to act on the mind, the mind of a young person from different sides. Here one should use various evidence, methods of explanation and suggestion of one’s point of view. It is important to know how to develop independence in a teenager. After all, this skill can be taught only at the stage of education. Namely, through the exercise, for example, systematically organize the execution of various actions. Such exercises will help to shape and develop a personality.
Learning and Incentive Method
Those who are interested in the question of how to raise a teenager will be interested to learn about two more methods that will be useful in communicating with a child. Talk about learning. The method is almost the dominant tool. You can teach with words, illustrative examples and actions. This classification must be supplemented by verification and fixing methods.
The next method is stimulation. This process helps the child to become aware of what has been done. Stimulation will help to awaken, give an impulse, give an impetus to thoughts, feelings, and then the child will act in the right direction.
Demonstration of love between family members
In fact, adolescent girls and boys are not much different. But there are small inclinations and differences between them in education. There are three methods of education. The first rule is a demonstration of love. The child should feel comfort and coziness in the house. For this, it is important to surround him not only with care, but also with love. Often in incomprehensible situations, it is important for the child to express support. Each family member should show tenderness and attention, as well as actively participate in the life plans of a young person. For any positive or negative event, it is important to note the child’s behavior and give a soft assessment of his actions.
Strictness in education. Should it be?
The second rule of education is rigor. If you are interested in how to educate a teenager correctly, then you should not forget about rigor. The child will not be able to correctly perceive instructive words if the parents do not keep external control. Moreover, it should be strictly voiced. Only then is it possible for a child to manifest independence so that he can independently control his actions.
Follow the sequence is also necessary in their actions and actions. In the event of a repeated situation, there is no need to resort to screaming and create an atmosphere of fear for the child. Such aggression only closes the feelings of a teenager. Control must be gradually loosened. The child must take independent steps towards the right goal. Otherwise, all controlled actions will not allow him to understand his behavior. A teenager must feel control over his behavior, understand what he is doing right and what is not.
If you follow these three rules of education, you will get an excellent result. The child should show a sense of self-regulation of his behavior. It is possible to strengthen self-control by performing physical exercises. The most effective sport is considered a team sport - football, basketball, hockey.
Puberty
The most difficult stage in the development of a person’s personality is the teenage period. Every parent should know how to raise a teenager at 14 years old. This is the period when the process of puberty occurs, physiological signs are formed, a character is developed, certain emotions are manifested. The transitional age in a girl begins much earlier than in boys. Therefore, when thinking about how to raise a teenager a boy or a girl, it should be remembered that the methods of their training are slightly different. Let's talk about this in more detail.
Features and differences in the education of boys and girls
The main distinguishing features are such nuances that the boy needs to be trusted, but the girl should be taken care of. If you often show love to a boy, give him gentle care, then in the eyes of a child it will look as if his parents do not trust him. From lack of faith he will not have independence. But if a girl is given complete freedom in choosing her actions, then she might think that nobody needs her and nobody loves her. A son needs to express his concern only through trust.
The feelings of a girl and a boy at an early age will also be different. This should always be considered. If a teenage boy did the right thing, then his independent action must be supported. It is also necessary to motivate his action, so that in the future each action is considered.
Features of the education of girls. What should be considered?
Every mother should know how to raise a teenage girl. After all, a girl is a gentle creature who needs care and special attention. In any case, she will show her feelings, emotions and sometimes even tears.
Girls need to be loved and constantly show this love to them in practice, so that they feel it and understand that they are valued. Girls need approval, care and understanding. It is also especially important to help in difficult times and support. As soon as the girl feels the care directed at her, self-confidence, her actions and actions will immediately appear. And in the future it will be easy for her to cope with certain difficulties and problems.
Tips for Parents
Much has been said about how to raise a teenager. From the whole large number of recommendations, the most important criteria can be distinguished, which should be paid attention to each parent who has a teenager in his home:
- Parents should be interested in the affairs of their child and be sure to participate in them. Or rather help and support. This will help to control his actions and jointly overcome difficulties. If the attention and help of the parents is not enough, then the child may have low self-esteem.
- Moms and dads should not only educate, but also listen and empathize with the child. Parents who do not have such feelings will cause indifference in the child.
- Dads and mothers should have love and positive emotions. They should be shown not only to the teenager, but also to each other. If a child sees love and tenderness in a family, then he will always have positive and light emotions in his soul.
- Recognition and approval of the actions of children by parents.
- Trust should be shown to the child. Distrust of a teenager will cause fear to manifest itself.
- Parents should set a personal example for the child, which will be based on correct behavior, the commission of only deliberate actions and actions.
- Be sure to pay attention to the school life of a teenager. This is necessary so that he feels the control of his parents and fulfills his learning responsibilities in full. After all, it’s clear that this will be useful to him.
We have reviewed the general tips for raising older children. Make efforts to find a common language with even the most difficult teenager, and your efforts will be rewarded.