The upbringing of a small person is a fairly responsible and complex process in which everyone is involved: teachers, parents, society.
At all times, the problem of upbringing was very acute; specialists, parents, and public figures tried to solve it, developing recommendations and scientific papers.
But even now no correct single solution has been found. After all, each baby is an individual with its own character: excitable or calm, assiduous or restless, therefore it is impossible to develop a single recipe for education. It is only possible, using general fundamental principles, to apply an individual approach to a child, consistent with its innate features.
What is parenting
In modern pedagogy, two semantic definitions of education are shared: wide and narrow.
The concept of "education" in the broad sense is defined as a systematic targeted process of the joint influence of teachers and parents on both sides of a person, physical and spiritual, in such a way as to develop personality, prepare for life in society and participation in all areas of activity: cultural, industrial, social . In other words, upbringing provides for the transfer to the child of accumulated social experience and family traditions.
It is noted that one should not forget that the formation and development of personal characteristics is greatly influenced by the surrounding cultural environment and the environment in which a person is outside the family and school.
The concept of “education” in the narrow sense includes the development, under the guidance of teachers and family members, of the character, moral and ethical position, and positive qualities of the social behavior of a member of society.
Adolescent education
In the period from eleven to eighteen years old, serious changes take place in the body of the child: the hormonal background makes them grow physically. At the same time, it also affects the psycho-emotional state of children, they grow up.
In this regard, the upbringing of adolescents is a rather difficult task, which, unfortunately, not everyone can handle: a lot of patience, attention and understanding on the part of the adult environment are required.
Changes in the children's psyche most often have the following features:
- reality is perceived as critically as possible;
- new, not always positive idols become role models;
- behavior is subject to frequent changes in moods;
- personal opinions are formed on various issues;
- depending on the upbringing and living environment, a craving for crimes, drug use, persistent lack of appetite, and others may appear.
But the serious problem of upbringing does not arise with every teenager, and this is connected not only with the individual inborn qualities of the child. Of great importance in this is the previous education and relations between family members.
If the child had enough love, parental warmth, care and hugs, but at the same time the parents did not flow to his whims, then the child is unlikely to have the idea to engage in criminal activities or forget.
Also, a great role is played by how confidently and democratically parents interacted with the baby. The closer the relationship was, the greater the likelihood that they remain with the teenager, which will allow him to share his feelings with his parents.
Therefore, trying to answer the question of how to raise a teenager, one should not forget that this process begins long before the problem age. A general recommendation to help parents is to set an example for a teenager.
The importance of family education
Very often, children with their demeanor make parents fall into a stupor: they simply do not know what to do next. And one of these character traits of a child is hysteria.
Some try to solve the problem with a scream, while others use physical force. Only the result is usually zero, and in a similar situation everything repeats.
Most often, the cause of this behavior is the problem of family education, that is, the inconsistency and inconsistency of the actions of adults that directly affect the development of the baby. This may be expressed in the following:
- once allowed to do something, and the second - banned;
- lowering authority;
- one member of the family allows the TV to be turned on loudly (stomping through puddles, jumping on the bed, not eating dinner, going to bed late, and so on), and the other not.
This happens again because each family member grew up and was brought up in different conditions and developed its own principles and rules.
Thus, everyone is trying to conduct the process of education in their own way, personally. Nobody canceled his personal view of things here, but in order not to harm the baby, it is important to coordinate their actions without conflict: discuss points of view, develop common approaches, discuss situations.
Organization of the educational process
It has long been proven that the formation of a person’s personality is directly dependent on relationships and parenting in the family, which are the fundamental foundation of all subsequent life. And the reliability and strength of this foundation will depend on a person’s attitude to various life situations.
Therefore, it is important to build relationships so that the problems of family education come to naught, are resolved peacefully and have the least impact on the child.
The educational process is easiest in large families, since the attention of relatives is distributed evenly, and the older ones look after the younger ones. In a large family there is a natural adaptation to communication and life in a team, accustoming to care and friendship.
The composition and structure of the family are of paramount importance to the child. No grandparents can replace mom or dad. Therefore, special attention is required to the process of education in single-parent families.
When the child is aware of this situation, it becomes painful, he may become isolated. It is important to protect the child from adult ambitions and conflicts and try to surround him with even more attention.
Patriotic education
Several years ago, due to various circumstances, there was a weakening of attention to patriotic work on the part of the state. As a result, less attention has been paid to this issue in kindergartens, schools and universities.
But now the situation is changing, and the question of how to educate a patriotic personality is again becoming relevant.
In pedagogy, patriotism is defined as the most important value, which is expressed not only in the historical-cultural and military-ideological aspects, but also as a spiritual, moral and social characteristic.
The implementation of patriot education is facilitated by:
- experimental research on the history of the war years;
- organization of school museums;
- introducing children to work with veterans and more.
But the contradictions and at the same time the problems of patriotic education are manifested in the fact that, if you want to carry out this work, educational institutions do not have enough conditions and opportunities for its implementation.
This applies not only to the material and technical base, but also to the timely updating of teaching aids, establishing contacts with families on these issues. There is also a lack of trained specialists and the most extensive media coverage of patriotism.
Actual problems of education
Modern pedagogy divides education into four types:
- Dictatorship is the systematic suppression of dignity, personality traits and initiative by older children or adults. As a result - resistance, fears, lack of confidence and lower self-esteem, unwillingness to do anything.
- Non-intervention (inaction) - giving the child complete freedom. The problem of upbringing by this method is that it develops detachment from the family, distrustfulness and suspicion.
- Hyperopeca - is a complete provision of the child and at the same time its protection from difficulties. Using this method, parents bring up egocentrism, lack of independence, weakness in decision making.
- Cooperation - based on a community of interests, support, joint activities. This style leads to independence, equality, family unification.
Usually in families a clash of all styles is manifested, which is the main problem of upbringing.
To solve it, it is important to understand that it is necessary to use all styles. But only their symbiosis, and not confrontation, will make it possible to avoid even greater problems.
How to raise boys
Almost all parents of sons have a question about how to raise a boy as a decent and courageous person.
Many do not even suspect how important the son is the care and love of the pope, and not just his mother. Men believe that they should not show such feelings, but meanwhile they relieve tension and allow relationships to be sincere.
In our century, full of events and crises, modern children, more than ever, need to communicate with their parents.
It becomes a necessity for a boy to go to the park with his dad, ride a bicycle, make a birdhouse, help his mother, but you still can find male activities! Communication with the older generation is also important. Such continuity will make it possible to transfer this style to your family in the future.
Also, for the development of the boy, classes in sports or tourist sections will be useful, which will strengthen not only and not so much health as character.
Parenting a girl
It is no secret that the characteristics of the upbringing of boys and girls are somewhat different, and this is due not only to gender, but also to life tasks.
The girl tries to be like a mother in everything, which is an example for her daughter. She learns from her to communicate with her husband, men and others, to do housework, receive guests, spend holidays and much more. Therefore, it is important for mother to monitor her manner of speaking and the actions taken.
Friends, relatives and acquaintances also influence the upbringing. It is important to emphasize in the eyes of the girl the positive qualities, dignities of the people and the fact that the mother would like to see them with her daughter. She will certainly try to fulfill her mother’s desire.
The upbringing of adolescents requires special attention. You need to try to unobtrusively keep abreast of the interests of your daughter at this age, to know the circle of her friends and acquaintances, so that, if necessary, point out the shortcomings and adjust her affection. For this, you can draw the attention of the girls to the heroes of books or films.
Also important for the future hostess is needlework, household chores, and cooking. From her mother, she can learn to care for herself, style and taste in things.
A special role is given to the education of the girl to dad, he must, like his mother, give her flowers, give her hand, congratulate on holidays, say compliments and more. This will save the daughter in the future from fears and communication complexes.
Theoretical Foundations
The theory and methods of education, although they are called upon to solve the same problem, are approached by completely different methods.
The theory of education is divided into three main groups (the rest are their derivatives):
- Biogenic. This direction is based on the fact that personality traits are hereditary and almost not subject to change.
- Sociogenic. It is argued that only social factors influence personality development.
- Behavioral. It is believed that a person has skills and behavioral habits.
Apparently, the statement that the truth is contained somewhere in between will be fair.
Methods and styles of education
Over the years of the existence of psychology and pedagogy, many styles and methods of education have been proposed, the most popular will be considered in more detail.
Modern children in Japan are brought up on the principles of separation into time periods, in each of which a certain set of qualities develops. Up to five years, absolutely everything is allowed, and upon reaching this age and up to fifteen years the child is placed in a tight framework, the violation of which causes family and social censure. After fifteen years, a person is considered old enough to communicate on an equal footing.
Since the sixties of the last century, the popularity of the Nikitins method, which takes the early physical development of children as the basis for harmonious education , has not diminished.
No less used Walfdor methodology for raising children is based on spiritual and creative development and the use of only natural materials.
The educational technique of Glenn Doman is considered the method of early development of babies and the recipe by which geniuses are brought up. The basis of this method is development from birth. The system requires a lot of time and self-discipline from parents, but in the end gives amazing results.
The methodology for the education of Maria Montessori is another widely used system. This method consists in encouraging the child to take independent actions, analyze and correct errors. In the game, he decides what and how much to do, and the functions of teachers are to help the child do everything himself.
The main thing for all areas is the systematic nature of classes and following one system, rather than jumping by different methods.